“What is Your Dream? What are You Doing to Make it Happen?”

“What is your dream? What are you doing to make it happen?”

A top man in the field asked me this when I was in graduate school. I was puzzled by the question. I was in school pursuing a doctorate. Wasn't I already doing what I needed to do in order to make my dream happen?

Yes, and no. Because of the popularity of the academic track and the bias toward it in academic institutions, I was moving along the pipeline indirectly pursuing my dream. More directly, I was pursuing someone else's dream. Many people strive to secure the rare and coveted professor position at a respected university becoming an expert in a particular subfield due to years of training and research. But at the time, I already knew that path wasn't for me.

The first step in answering that question was to determine what my dream is. I want to be an astronaut, the same dream since childhood. But if I examine more closely, or just take a look at the specialty Florida license plate that I had ordered around this time which proclaimed 2LUNA – to the Moon – I'll note that my dream is to become a lunar astronaut or more broadly, a planetary astronaut. I was in school to be a planetary scientist, after all.

A look at NASA's direction at the time showed a choice: work hard to become an astronaut if you're lucky and you'll orbit Earth, or hold off on astronaut aspirations for a little while until NASA's next mission to somewhere. It didn't take me long to conclude that the private sector might be more in line with my goals. Although I still loved NASA, I had just come from working at MSFC and no longer saw working there as my end goal.

I was inspired by a company called Golden Spike which formed to create private human missions to the Moon. I even did a tiny side project with Golden Spike for a short while. I was just beginning to explore the world of the private space industry and I dove in head first. I knew that this is where I belonged. It seemed like the best avenue to make my dream become reality.

Years in the industry has taught me one thing over and over again: private industry can be as slow as government and doesn't always succeed. At this time, there is no path to me becoming a planetary astronaut. I don't have the funds to become a suborbital astronaut. I likely don't have the genes to become a NASA astronaut. The path forward for the pursuit of my dream is unclear.

So, what am I doing to make my dream happen? I'm joining the doers. I'm learning all I can and contributing to the progress of the space industry as a whole. I'm starting conversations with people smarter and more experienced than myself, I'm analyzing data, and later this year I hope to play with hardware again. I am working as part of something greater than myself.

Lately, I've been envious. I see others along the path with me and I want what they have. But I need to work to get there. I have my own needs and goals. Now, when I catch envy stirring in me, I ask myself not, “Why don't I have that?” but rather, “What do I need to do to get that? And do I even want it?” In discerning my actions, I can take the best steps forward. My life is no one else's.

What is your dream? What are you doing to make it happen? Don't just live on autopilot. Don't pursue someone else's dream. Really consider what actions you're taking to move forward in your pursuit. Don't be afraid of course corrections. Don't be afraid to try something new. Best of luck on your journey!

Finding the courage to pursue my dream, and to tell the world about it! - February 2011